School: crying it out, bugging out

Of course, it was too good to last. Wednesday, 3B didn’t nap at all at Mrs. K’s, and was still asleep Thursday morning when Mama had to bundle him up to go to school. Apparently he made it through half of the day just fine, but when another girl started crying, 3B joined in and didn’t stop for an hour.

His teachers tried soothing him for awhile, and his friend Little J came over to comfort him, but not even that and his lovie could bring him back around, so they lay 3B down on a mat and let him cry it out, which ended with him crying himself to sleep.

That’s a heartbreaking picture in my mind. I want to cry just typing it out like that, thinking of 3B curled up on a mat on the floor with his lovie, crying himself to sleep. He’s never been inconsolable like that…OK, except those first dozen trips to Mrs. K’s, when he would actually cry all day.

However, as I reminded Mama when she was bracing herself to send him off for his first day, this is a part of him becoming independent and, as much as it may make us lonely for him, being able to make himself happy without us around. And, thinking about how that girl triggered him, it’s also tied up in his blossoming capacity for empathy.

3B’s recently started giving kisses and hugs to characters in books who are sad, hurt or crying. He’s always been disturbed by others who are suffering around him, but now he’s started to internalize the hurt of others. Again, it makes me sad that he feels that pain, but I do want him to be empathetic and to understand others, to feel close to them.

However, given the latest email from school, I may be cautioning him against getting too close:

As many of you may already be aware, the beginning of the school year
brings with it many new and exciting experiences as well as some not so
new and definitely not very exciting experiences…namely the occurrence
of head lice. We have had several cases of head lice in our preschool
in the past couple of days.

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  • Empathy=good.
    Head lice=not good.

    Sounds like he was overtired. It’s a hard transition into a new environment, and kids naturally resist napping because the world is just too darn interesting.

    Now if anyone could tell me why my daughter naps every day at preschool, but won’t nap at home on the weekends, and how to rectify that situation, I’d be mighty grateful.

  • I am wondering why my 18 year old gets all whiny at me every day now that she is NOT going to school and finds herself bored, pretty much every day. I seem to be able to find enough to do, and I am not even including my nap.

    Amama: kids will always behave better for others than they do for their own parents, who are endlessly trying to teach their kids to treat others well.

    Good luck with the head lice thing. Hopefully he didn’t get any, but it is always safe to check, and check again.

  • We got that same not for Thing 1’s kindergarten, except it was ringworm. Sure, why not?

  • AMama, Kmoo: Yes, all transitions are difficult…and yes, 3B eats better and plays better for Mrs. K and I expect him to do the same for his teachers.

    Whit: Ringworm? I’m washing my hands after writing to you.

  • What a wonderfully empathetic little one you guys have.
    But…as parents….I'm sure the thought of him alone & crying on his little mat was heartbreaking.

    The head lice thing…oh, I hope you guys don't get it!